- Drunken Movie Night! Tonight's feature is FernGully: The Last Rainforest. Standard disclaimers apply... if you don't know them by now, it's your own damn fault if you get offended.
- Hello, Krista! Christa? However she spells herself.
- That was a freaky cat-possum thing.
- Holy shit, I think that was a cassowary. Cassowaries are not your friends.
- I wonder what determines the color that a fairy turns while flying?
- Damn, I was way off. She spells herself Crysta.
- Wait, why are the cassowaries British?
- Help it grow by squishing it with your hand!
- Why are you propping up a dying tree, old fairy? You're acting against nature.
- And Robin Williams as the crazy bat. WInning!
- Also, very disturbing.
- Potato in a jacket! Crazy bat rap is the best.
- I wonder if this is where the term batshit crazy came from?
- "Humans don't have tails. THey have big bottoms that they walk around with wearing bad shorts."
- I want it noted that I'm not too drunk to fix my typing errors, just too lazy... it's been a long week.
- What's keeping her fairy skirt up when she stands upside down?
- That's an impressive machine and all, but I'd still rather have a Goblin Shredder.
- I'm gettin' some weird vibes off this tree, man.Ah snap! There goes his Walkman.
- I don't think fairy size is normally a gift. Good thing there's a hot lady fairy involved.
- WOo! Air-surfing on a leaf!
- "If I'm gonna eat somebody, it might as well be you."
- Freaky leeches....
- I REMEMBERED THAT LINE!
- "What's a human?" "Delicious and nutritious. Taste just like chicken."
- I wonder how much it would cost to floor your house with planks from the Hexxus tree?
- I'll show you some magic, if you know what I mean.
- Ouch....
- Man, Hexxus really holds a grudge.
- Tim Curry is pretty much the best bad guy ever.
- HIS FACES ARE EATING EACH OTHER!
- I wonder how fucking stoned the people who made this movie were.
- It would definitely be interesting to see a Ralph Bakshi version of it.
- Cool means hot.
- She kind of is a bodacious babe. But I know some actual bodacious babes who have the advantage of being real, and not 6" tall.
- "Which way to FernGully?" *points that way* *they go that way* "Hey, what is this place?" "FernGully." /facepalm
- What is it with non-humans falling for humans in all these cartoons?
- On the bright side, fairy magic is keeping the dude-fairies' kilts down too.
- Also, Christian Slater's cartoon looks a lot like Christian Slater.
- C'mon everybody, sing along with this song you've never heard before!
- Duck-billed platypus sighting! And a kangaroo. So apparently we're in Australia. That explains why the cassowaries (which I always thought were more New Guinean) have British-ish accents, but not why nobody else does.
- He's not going remotely close to fast enough to hydroplane.
- HOLY SHIT, FAIRIES CAN TELEPORT!
- So why do they even bother flying?
- Hey look, one more movie that Avatar stole stuff from.
- It burns! It burns us precious!
- If the leveler was spewing that much oil, I'm pretty sure the engine would've locked up by now.
- And that's why you never trust a guy with bleached blond hair.
- A fairy circle! Now you'll be stuck dancing all night.
- Hmmm... Crysta is the only blue glowy fairy.
- What they could really use right about now is some Ents.
- Don't do it Crysta! Go Dark Side! That's where the true power lies.
- Old fairy lady totally just pulled an Obi-Wan. But now all the fairies are glowing blue instead of green. So... that's cool, I guess.
- And they haven't even had to change the chain on the chainsaw yet. That is some high quality equipment.
- WTF was that thing?
- I think his battle cry was "Bidet!" Which is not particularly intimidating, unless you're poop.
- Womp womp.
- I gotta get my fix, man!
- You did not choose a high efficiency form, Hexxus.
- But now you're a giant burny skeleton, so I guess it kind of worked out for you still.
- There's a Peck with an acorn, and he's pointing it at me!
- And now all the fairies are green again. What gives?
- Just think of all the potential growth energy she's wasting by growing flowers everywhere she walks.
- And he's a lefty too! No wonder he was sketchy.
- Here, let me plant this seed where a bunch of other trees are already growing.
- See, deforestation isn't a problem at all... we just need to convince the tree spirits to work harder. Lazy bastards.
- The last time I saw this movie was in third grade, when my class sponsored an acre of rainforest somewhere in Brazil. It may or may not still be there.
- Thus concludes this evening's festivities. It wasn't quite as exciting as the last DMN, so it may well be another 20+ years before I watch this one again. Mark your calendars for sometime next month, when the next DMN happens!
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